Tuesday, August 28, 2012

How to Be Indifferent

When asked a question or pressed for an opinion, you can choose to be indifferent on the matter by using simple gestures or by employing nondescript terminology. Being indifferent can work to your advantage in the long run or be useful to deter people you're not interested in knowing. Read on to learn how to be indifferent. 

Instructions:

1. Shrug your shoulders when someone asks you a question while giving a blase look in his direction. If pressed further, reply with statements that show you're indifferent to the topic, like, "No opinion," or "Haven't given it much thought."

2. Redirect questions to ask the other person her opinions and get the spotlight off yourself. Later on, people are likely to not even notice that you didn't answer the question. Be the moderator if sides exist by encouraging others to talk and asking proponents of both sides to share further.

3. Play both sides of the coin. Be the devil's advocate at one moment, then go with popular opinion the next. This will leave people to guess which side you're actually on. If they ask in a private moment, be sure to not tell them.

4. Leave the room, get a glass of water, start up another conversation to prove that you really aren't interested and are actually so bored you need to do something else.
  • Tips & Warnings

    • Never directly state your opinion or show your emotions, if you do feel strongly on an issue. Bite your tongue and fight the need to be heard. Do so by convincing yourself that in this particular crowd, at this particular moment, it's better for you to remain neutral.

     


     

    Sunday, August 12, 2012

    Tips For The Reluctant, Indifferent and Negative Traveler

    My father was very hesitant about traveling to Mexico before we went there this past May. I’m always excited to travel, so my father’s negative reaction on going to Mexico puzzled me. But I know not everyone loves to travel. Some people may like to travel, but like my father, they may find themselves going to a destination they have no interest in. Other people might hate traveling altogether, but perhaps they have to travel every now and then (like for business).

    I decided to put myself in the shoes of the reluctant, indifferent and negative traveler. What would I do if I had to travel, but I didn’t want to travel? What would I do if I had to travel some place, but I didn’t want to go there? These are tips I came up with to help those who are reluctant, indifferent and negative toward traveling.
      1. Research the destination.
      Before going to Mexico my father had a pretty negative image about the country. Negative thoughts often stem from fear of the unknown. The only things my father knew about Mexico came from the evening news. And let’s face it, the news usually only reports about another country if something bad has happened (death and/or destruction). This isn’t to say you shouldn’t pay attention to the news, but take it with a grain of salt. Since I had done some research, and knew the area of Mexico we were going to would be safe for tourists, I felt much more comfortable with going there. Remember, knowledge is power.

      2. Vary your research sources.
      This is related to the first point, but make sure don’t just stick to one source of information when researching a destination. This will only give you a skewed view of a destination. Tourism boards, and travel companies are only going to show the positive points of a destination. The news, like I mentioned in the first point, will really only focus on the negative points.

      3. Try to talk to someone who’s lived or spent a lot of time in the destination you’ll be visiting.
      Locals will be able to provide inside tips or highlights of the destination that some people may not know. And while everyone’s opinion will differ, a local will have insight on the good, the bad and the ugly of a destination. Check a variety of sources to get the best picture you possibly can.

      4. Take personal opinions and recommendations with a grain of salt.
      Everyone loves to give advice. But no one’s experience with a destination will be the same. I love New York City. If someone said, “here’s a free plane ticket to New York. The flight leaves in an hour” I’d pack a bag, grab my passport and be out the door within 2 minutes. But I know not everyone will love New York. So if someone says “it was the best” or “it was the worst” about a place, know your experience won’t be the same.

      5. Only boring people get bored.
      There’s always something to do, no matter where you are. Yes, not every place is going to have 24/7 nightlife and parties. Not every place will have thrill seeking adventures at every turn. But there will be something to do. One of the benefits of doing a little pre-trip research is that you’ll probably get an idea of what types of things a destination will have to offer before you go there. If you don’t know what to do ask around. Ask the locals and other travelers you see what they like to do. Send out a message on Twitter or Facebook, etc and ask for recommendations on what to see and do. You should be able to find something to do (if you want) at any destination.


      I grew up in the Prairies. If I can find something to do here, I can find something to do anywhere.

      6. Improve your attitude.
      There’s something in psychology called the self-fulfilling prophecy. Essentially it works like this: John Doe is going to destination X, and he thinks his trip there will be horrible, and everyone from destination X will be awful. When John gets to destination X he reacts in a negative way because of the preconceptions that he has. Since John is behaving in a negative way, the people there react to John in a negative way, and this causes John to be more negative as well. John doesn’t realize that it’s his own behaviour that’s caused the people to react negatively.

      I see examples of self-fulfilling prophecies in travel a lot. My father had a negative reaction about Mexico, before he even set foot in the country. No place will be perfect, but you shouldn’t expect the worst, especially before you go somewhere. This will only cloud your experience and you might not be able to see the good points that a place has.

      7. Life isn’t perfect, and neither is travel.
      Just because something has gone wrong, it doesn’t mean an entire place, or an entire group of people are bad. I had really bad service from a rude waiter in the US once. It would be unfair and inaccurate for me to say all Americans are rude because of this one bad encounter I experienced. Sometimes shit just happens. Deal with it. Drop the negative attitude, and move on.

      8. Be honest.
      No place or experience will be perfect, but if something is bothering you let someone know (preferably someone who can help you out). If you’re lost, and you don’t ask anyone for directions then you can’t be upset that no one is helping you find your way. If the television your hotel room isn’t working don’t sit and sulk all night, and then bitch to the front desk the next morning that they didn’t fix your TV (I used to work at a hotel and I’ve seen that happen). No one can read your mind. If you’re having issues or problems tell someone about it. Be calm, but be firm with your request. Chances are you’ll be able to get the problem fixed, or find an alternative solution that can help you out.

      9. Get out and do something.
      I know there’s no right way to travel, but you can’t really learn or experience a place if the only thing you see is the inside of your hotel lobby. So go explore. Take a walk down the street. Catch a cab and go to another area of town, or maybe take a train or bus to another town. You could come across a great restaurant, or a local event, or a cool attraction. If going off on your own seems intimidating then take a tour. Lots of cities offer free walking tours. You could even take a bus tour or a boat tour, and see the highlights of a place. You won’t know what great things are out there until you get out and find them.

      10. Know your limits.
      If you don’t like being on a boat then don’t agree to go on a boat tour. If you’ve tried staying in a hostel dorm room before and hated it, then don’t book a stay at a hostel dorm room. You might not be able to get everything that you want on your trip, but if you’re going somewhere you don’t want to go to, then you should at least try to make things easier for yourself.

      11. Do something you want to do.
      Sure if you’re traveling with others you might have to compromise, but it’s okay to be selfish once in awhile as well. My father had no interest in going to Mexico, until my mom mentioned to him that he could go deep sea fishing. My father loves fishing, and after my mom’s suggestion he started to get excited to go to Mexico, if only to fish. It doesn’t matter if that activity is some adrenaline pumping thing, like bungee jumping, or something simple, like going to the movies. Doing something that you love to do, or have always wanted to do, will help give a rewarding travel experience.

      12. Don’t use fiction to measure reality.
      It’s easy to get image of what a place is like in your head after watching TV, movies or reading books about it. I loved the movie Amelie. As soon as I saw it I wanted to hop a flight to Paris because of how the city was portrayed in the movie. My experience in Paris was completely different from the idea that I got of Paris from Amelie. Not that my experience was bad (too short, that’s for sure) but it wasn’t the same. Don’t set an unrealistic expectation by thinking a movie, television show or book can give you an accurate view of a place, because it can’t.

      13. Every experience and every place is unique.
      When we went to Chichen Itza my parents said it wasn’t the same as the Great Pyramids in Egypt. I understand sometimes there are places that standout in our minds, especially if it was a first or unique experience. You don’t have to like everything the same, but understand each place is unique and it’s not fair to compare it to other places you’ve been to in the past.

      Chichen Itza, Mexico
      The Great Pyramid at Chichen Itza.

      So there you have it, my suggestions on how to have a positive travel experience when you don’t want to travel. As for my father he grew to enjoy his time in Mexico. I think if my father can come around and like Mexico, then just about anyone can have a good experience when they travel.